Bismillahir Rahmanir Raheem
Today we’re going to dive into a story that happened not too long ago.
She was the girl that all the guys made a beeline for and the girls wanted as their friend. She was loud,crazy,funny and popular. She also knew how to charm the opposite gender.Her phone would beep incessantly, flooding with messages and calls from wanted and unwanted admirers.
She sometimes would read her salaah and sometimes evade it, getting engrossed in her latest shenanigans and ensuring she didn’t get caught. It took time and effort to plan that.
Those that knew what was going on, worried about her. She came from a pious family but was duping them.
She got a kick out of leading guys on and toying with their emotions/interest as an entertainment.Music, movies and midnight escapades all part of the cycle.
Then she met him. The one that made her fall head over heels. Suddenly her whole world altered, it was as if he clouds moved and he sunlight poured in. She was in love. He was The One. She would caress her phone,reading and re-reading his messages. Meetings with him was the highlight of her day. He was responsible for the butterflies in her stomach and twinkle in her eye.
While in the middle of their springtime love affair,something happened. That never happened before.
What was it?
She felt guilty.
This feeling was unexpected, suddenly the words of Deen that she constantly heard but didn’t pay attention to, was seeping into her heart. She realised what was happening. That guilty feeling was hidayat knocking at her heart.
And she opened the door. Alhamdulilah.
Hidayat(Guidance) is such a commodity that,it must be desired too.
Against all odds, against whatever was expected of her, she decided that she needed to end this haraam reltionship. It took tears, guts and courage and broke her heart. But when the heart is broken for the sake of Allah, then Allah Himself pieces it together again. He answers the duas of a heart broken for His sake.
Her boyfriend was thrown off course, he didn’t expect to be ‘dumped’, he too had his pick and choice from ardent females, and here,the one who he wanted, suddenly didn’t want him. And since nikaah was not possible at that time, she wanted to cut all contact and refused even a once a week call.
She explained herself repeatedly to him and resolved to move on. It was difficult initially. Very,very difficult. To lose that someone who became your one in 6 billion.
She pulled out her musallah and began reading all her salaah,even while her mother was not there to watch. She opened the Quran and filled the same time she would use for haraam, with tilaawat of the Quran. She opened her text books and actually studied. Her grades improved. She began spending more time with her family. Laughing and talking, cementing ties and creating memories.
And she did two more things.
She made taubah and she made dua. To marry him.
Without indulging in a haraam realtionship prior to nikaah. How can a journey which is haraam have a halaal destination? Yes it can result in nikah but if tauba is not made,the damage shows up often.
When the first kiss,first hug, first long convo,first ice cream together etc has already been done before nikah, then understand why one’s marriage feels a bit jaded so soon. Because the firsts were supposed to be enjoyed within nikah.
However don’t despair if the lines were crossed before nikah, fall before Allah,the Most Compassionate, in taubah and ask Him to wipe out the effect of the sin of loving and being together in whatever way before nikah. And make the effort to bring deen alive in one’s nikah.
So,back to her. He tried and tested her resolve a couple of times by contacting her with soppy,syrupy messages or sad calls,missing her too intensely.
And she did falter at first and then shockingly, she told him,if he truly loved her, he would forget her. As her akhirat was at stake. He finally got it and stayed away.
And she continued making dua. Time ebbed and slipped away.
There was another concern, while she wanted to marry him and thus was her dua(prayer),she was concerned about his commitment to being a better Muslim and since they had done the right thing and cut ties, she couldn’t discuss it with him.
Often shaitan will deceive a couple that they’re okay because they’re discussing Deen or not touching/ meeting/ going too far. But all of that mindset is wrong. Nabi SAW would have never approved, Sahaba RA never made such excuses and most importantly, this heart is exclusively for Allah as a single person.
Meanwhile, he found himself talking to his brother, who was deeni, about his situation. His brother adviced him and one day, Allah Ta’aala threw open the doors of hidayat for him too. He grew his designer beard into a sunnah beard and exchanged the labelled jeans and snug tees for a kurta and a hat.
He became punctual with his salaah and his parents noticed that their young son was not only acting mature but looked it too.
And she carried on making dua, with no contact or meeting between them.
Whether it would be accepted or not, she had no idea. But she heard of his change.
And then after almost two years since she broke off contact, he came to her door. To take her away as his bride. Now the meeting was coloured with shyness and anticipation, the blush of hayaa painted on.
It wasn’t an easy journey. It was one where one’s faith was tested. It was letting go and trusting in Allah to make the best choices. It was removing the blindness that consumes one and the stepping back from forbidden feelings to embrace Allah’s pleasure.
They’re married for a few years now. With kids,alhamdulilah. She wears the hijab and he appreciates it. Yes they fight as normal couples do but they also make each other laugh alot and they prioritized Deen in their lives. They do have challenges and they also have their joy.
So they got their happily imperfectly okay ever after, and they went the best route…through Tauba. And Dua.
But a better route would have been no reltionship at all. But if Allah wipes out and we make the effort, alhamdulilah.
She trusted even though she made dua that if he wasn’t good for her, Allah would send better.
Because He alone knows best. What is best for us long term.
So ask, ask away in dua for Anything one desires,car,job,house,partner,trip,good health,shoelace. Shoelace? Yes the Sahaba RA used to make dua for Allah to grant them a shoelace too if they didn’t possess one.Or if they needed one.
Ask Allah first before asking anyone for anything even if they seem to have the power to give it to us.
Ask Allah and don’t give up hope,for what is in our destiny Must come to us, when Allah knows the time is right.
Nabi SAW said – Dua is the essence of worship.
Mankind gets angry when asked for things repeatedly, Allah becomes angry when we don’t ask Him. SubhanAllah.
Name of the post was changed so as not to infringe on another blog’s title.